Stuff We Did This Weekend

1. Found ourself the victim of an unfortunate series of events involving a peacefully napping Rejectionist and cat, a Support Team transporting a small tub of hydrochloric acid from one end of the apartment to the other (don't ask), the dropping of the small tub of hydrochloric acid and subsequent agitation of aforementioned cat, who leapt to her feet and ran across our face with claws extended; the end result of this disastrous chain of causality being that we look distinctly as though we spent the weekend brawling. However, we feel this lends a pleasingly rakish effect to our appearance, and we have gotten quite good at saying "Well, the other guy is dead" with a perfectly straight face when people ask us what happened.

2. Saw the ludicrously amazing band Dark Dark Dark, which may have resulted in a certain Rejectionist having some Very Emotional Moments and getting a little weepy during a couple of songs. So what. Shut up. Possibly there were also serious thoughts about buying a truck, quitting all our jobs, filling our pocket with the meager contents of our savings account, bailing out of this cesspool of a city, driving across the southwest a bunch of times with the wind in our hair, sleeping under the stars, and going swimming in rivers. WHAT THE HELL ARE WE DOING IN NEW YORK WHERE THERE ARE NO TREES AND ALL THE PEOPLE ARE CRAZY. Dark Dark Dark is on tour right now! go see them if they come to your town! If this song doesn't give you chills you have no heart and you are not allowed to be our friend any more.

3. Went running. Was almost run over by a horse-drawn wagon overflowing with delighted Hasidic children, being driven by a man with a pronounced white-blond hair-metal mullet in a half-shirt and cutoff jeans shorts. SPRING IS HERE.

4. We have been so homesick lately that we actually tried to watch the Twilight movie, which is filmed in our ancestral homeland of the North Olympic Peninsula. Oh my god, Author-friends, that movie is REALLY. BAD. We didn't make it all the way through but we did get to have a Cleolinda moment with our Support Team, who watched about fifteen minutes with us, and was all like "But they are out in the daytime?" and then we were like "They can go out in the sunlight, it's just that they're REALLY SPARKLY," and then he made an astonished face, and we were all like NO REALLY AND ALSO THEY EAT DEERS BECAUSE THEY ARE VEGETARIANS AND THAT MUMBLY LITTLE PIPSQUEAK IS REALLY A WEREWOLF. Twilight is never having to say you're kidding!