Pre-Resolutions Checkup

For those of you who are participating, we are a week into our Pre-Resolutions! How is everyone doing? Are you all writing your little writerly things? Loving yourselves? Eating your vegetables?

We must admit up front to having failed rapidly and entirely with our Resolution to refrain from taking the name of the Lord in vain, but we did try. For a few minutes, anyway. Our sally upon our backlog of New Yorkers experienced a major setback on Sunday, when we discovered YET ANOTHER pile of unread magazines dating back to MAY, but we did not allow this bump in the road to deter us from our Goal. We are currently three New Yorkers down, seventeen to go. Lola Pants has not received any caviar, but we did buy her a fancier kind of cat food, which has been met with disinterest.

As for our liver? Author-friends, the sober and uncaffeinated Rejectionist is, like, a COMPLETELY DIFFERENT PERSON. A person who LEAPS OUT OF BED at SIX IN THE MORNING and labors mightily upon her Great Works before scampering off to her day job! A person of great cheer and industry! A person who ran five miles, cleaned the apartment, did the laundry, paid all the bills, wrote letters--real letters! on paper!--to friends, worked away at her Writing Projects, AND went to a dinner party ALL IN ONE DAY. Who IS this terrifying stranger? She is like the Ian MacKaye of bloggers! A horrid, proselytizing terrorist of clean living! We can barely stand to be in the same room with her! UGH! Dreadful! Next she is going to hijack our blog and start dropping saccharine tripe about Following Your Heart and Finding Your Inner Voice and Embracing Heart Wisdom on Your Publishing Journey and other claptrap! She will start an inspirational twitter! She will rescue orphaned puppies! DESPICABLE!

In happier news (and speaking of hobbits), someone asserted at the aforementioned dinner party that the Lord of the Rings trilogy is "not a great work of literature," and had we been even the slightest bit tipsy that ill-spoken young gentleman might have experienced grievous physical harm to his person. So this deprivation does have some few benefits.

How are YOU???