HERE WE ARE! ON THE WEST COAST! IT IS VERY EXCITING. Do you know they have TREES here, also some very splendid MOUNTAINS, also there are birds chirping outside our window that are not PIGEONS and last night we ate some vegetables that had come out of the earth, like, recently! AMAZING


We flew out yesterday and could not help but think how extraordinary it is to live in a world where one can be taking a taxi through swamp-hot Brooklyn, discussing class warfare and great works of Indian literature with one's Bangladeshi driver in the morning, and crossing the cool grey Puget Sound sitting next to a gaggle of elderly persons swathed in polarfleece and planning their headstones in the afternoon; but that is the world we live in, the world of now. It is very disorienting for us to come home to a place we love with all our heart and yet is no longer large enough to hold us--maybe never was large enough to hold us, now that we think about it--and so there is always some sadness mixed in with the joy of being back among the mountains and the wild things. And of course there is always that particular gleeful delight of returning to The Country, giddy with the pretension of now being a New Yorker, and rolling our eyes at everyone's terrible outfits and gun racks and what have you, and loudly lamenting the impossibility of obtaining sushi at four in the morning. Not that we have ever eaten sushi at four in the morning in New York, but it does seem rather superior to be able to do such a thing if we wished, doesn't it? Tee hee.

So here we are! for a month! Here is a secret: we are forever being denied writer's residencies, which is for some reason more insulting to us than ordinary rejections. Being turned down for residencies feels rather as though someone has come over to our house and said, "I am sorry, Rejectionist, but you simply aren't good enough to come to writing camp," and obviously that is silly, but we never pretended to be an entirely rational person, did we. So instead we have decided to award ourself OUR OWN writing residency, which is Extremely Prestigious, and only Rejectionists are selected for it! SO THERE. After a brief sojourn in the wilds of the North Olympic Peninsula, being fed wholesome meals by the Parents Rejectionist, we shall repair to Seattle for our Self-Awarded Writing Residency and spend the remainder of July happily ensconced in creative labor. We will also, of course, find plenty of time for such activities as terrorizing the gentle populace of the Pacific Northwest with our "Brooklyn Summer" outfits, a brief stint roadie-ing for a legendary doom metal band, possibly crashing a hippie wedding, maybe ground-scoring some assault rifles, stuffing our face with regional specialties, and other adventures yet to be determined. We may be a bit scarce about the tinterweb, but you are all so clever and charming you will be quite fine without us, and there are lots of other blogs to read, etc., for those of you who are pretending to work at your desk jobs, and anyway GET OFF THE INTERNET AND GO WRITE YOUR BOOKS. WE INSIST.