Today's SMORGASBORD BONANZA FUNDRAISER AUCTION ITEM is a 5,000-word critique from your favorite internet rapscallion, the Rejectionist! (Me!) The Rejectionist has been described as "the Porsche of editors" by a satisfied client* and is world-renowned** for her patented method of "loving-ruthlessness." The Rejectionist's services are not for the faint of heart, but you can bet you'll never purple your prose in this town again. OH YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN.

*AM NOT making that up SHUT UP
**One time I edited someone from Australia's book

1. This auction will run until 9PM tomorrow, October 15th.
2. Bid using the comment section of this post. Please include your email or use a Blogger account I can contact you through.
3. Highest bidder by 9:00PM EST on October 15th wins the item. Once you win, you will have 24 hours to make your donation. If you do not make your donation, the next highest bidder will win the item.
4. Once your donation is made, email me your manuscript.
5. VARIOUS FINE PRINTS: I do not work in publishing any longer, I have not worked in publishing for quite some time, they don't even invite me to their parties anymore, a critique from me will in no way result in your manuscript coming in contact with anyone in the publishing industry. Please allow me six weeks to return your critiqued manuscript.
6. Who is this auction for? Details here.